Same, same; heck of a storm, comin' right up the valley from the southwest. Big black cloud, wall of water, thunder, lightin' and heavy wind. Got two or three miles away and broke up. We did get some sprinkles. Got ta smile and what? What do ya call it, when the weather, a loved one, just keeps performin' variations on a theme that seems quite contrary and ya know there's a conversation in there somewhere, but ya don't have a clue where it starts.
Anyway, made it to the dentist; hopin' he might be able ta plug and salvage my last bottom row "chomper". No, such luck. Upside, I suppose, I'm a little lighter; one tooth less ta pack around. But, I can't say I'm feelin' it yet; all the drugs they pump inta a fella, get 'er done, feel more like I'm packin' an extra sack a potatoes this mornin'. Like, the rain, I suppose, wait; it'll come around.
Otherwise, woke up thinkin' about history and war; actually one particular scene, from a hundred movies we've probably seen. It's the one where there's some kinda disaster comin' or goin' or in progress and there's, maybe, a mom and a child and maybe she's packin' up the child send 'em some place safe. The characters may vary, but the story's the same. They're hurryin', it's a very difficult situation, heart wrenchin', but the gist of it is and I can remember, word for word, one such film, "brace up", no time for feelin'.
Play it over, and over, and over; before movies, books, and before books, stories. In, other words, generations of recollection. Then, add all the modern technology, media, marketin' and technicolor mythology of the "unfeelin'" hero, and all the "money" to be made, sellin' the "gear" and the wars, keep validatin' the myth. Then, ask yer self, if there's really a big mystery, as ta how and why we've gotten so far away from ourselves. Or, how we come up with the craziest of ideas and "think" they are most reasonable; like another war.
I suppose, if we haven't lately, that we might go visit a mom with a new born child and consider for a moment, that young child might be way smarter than most of us "adults". Milk, a warm blanket, a good nap, gazin' into the eyes a the mom; completely magical. That kid is not likely ta spend any time lookin' up therapists in the yellow pages, or figurin' if he just had a little more money, life would be much better.
I just gotta ask myself, which makes more sense; ta brace up, harden myself against the storm, get numb with all the unavoidable math, that no matter how much I have it will never be enough, 'cause I can't feel anything! Or, ta dare and turn around, despite all the "hype" and all the "propaganda" and appreciate, one moment of my life.
That kinda courage, might not make great drama, but it just might "work" in the long run! I remember takin' a dive off a really big snow fort, we'd built in the school yard, when I was five or six. We were playin' cowboys and indians, I think, '50's, I was on top and one a the indians had clearly got a straight clear shot and my "sweetheart", Cindy, I think her name was, was watchin'. Well, no problem; I'd seen it on TV. Off I went head first on the ice below. I'd really have to say, it was spectacular, but, honestly, it didn't feel very good.
Have a great day!
Best,
jeune
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